14 Dumbest Ways That Humans Will Survive The Apocalypse

The whole point of a post - apocalyptic level is that someone exist . But when you have a cataclysm that wipes out 99.9 percent of all humans , then how precisely do you explain the survivors ? In honour of the new Maze Runner movie , here are the 14 dumbest ways mass survive the apocalypse .

1) God swoops in and saves us

Ca n’t really skip the genuine “ deus ex machina ” ending , in which God show up and fixes everything . See The Apple — really , see The Apple , it ’s great!—and the Battlestar Galactica reboot . Plus of form , Stephen King ’s The Stand .

2) Alien invaders turn out to have a silly weakness

Thisisa wholeotherlistbyitself , but it ’s still worth mentioning here . The extraterrestrial who show up and kill almost everybody — but then it turns out that they are vulnerable to the common low temperature ( in War of the Worlds ) , or computer virus ( in Independence Day ) or evident old water ( in Signs ) . Or in the 1962 Day of the Triffids , the plant monsters turn out to be aliens that are vulnerable to … salt . These are floor where the humans , by rights , should be toast .

3) The survivors regroup and become a spoof of Ancient Rome

Sorry , I love The Hunger Games , but I ’m never plump to get over the fact that the blasted remains of the United States somehow gets turned into a Roman pastiche where people have gens like Caesar Flickerman and Plutarch Heavensbee . And the genuine Carry Amelia Moore Nation is called the Latin word for “ bread , ” just to emphasise the “ bread and circuses ” matter . You ’d suppose with the human universe perilously close to extinction level , somebody would have abuse in and said , “ attend on a tic , is n’t this a minute , well , silly ? ”

4) Everybody lives on a super-train

Another post - apocalyptic taradiddle that we have sex , but which makes , countenance ’s face it , no sense at all : Snowpiercer . So let ’s just get this straight . Humans somehow loose an artificial Ice Age through our mood meddling , and rather of just hunkering down in an clandestine adeptness somewhere , we decide to turn on around and around on a Brobdingnagian train , on track that somehow never need to be maintain or deposit , burning dateless fuel ? Okay then . Just checking .

5) We get used as lithium batteries by computers

Like the “ foreigner are vulnerable to water / salinity / germ ” thing , this is another one that everybody complains about constantly — but it ’s still worth one more gripe . The Matrix is just a morsel airheaded , and you have to wonder if the A.I.s were just sort of blase and did this as a practical joke . “ Oh , sure , yeah , we ’re using you as — snarf — batteries . That ’s what we ’re doing . Heh . ”

6) Putting a whole town into suspended animation, then pretending that it’s still the pre-apocalyptic past.

Not mentioning the name of this fussy enfranchisement because it ’s still pretty late . But when you see an Revelation of Saint John the Divine coming , it might make mother wit to put a swelled chunk of people into suspension , to wake them up when the peril has pass . Except for the part where you wake them up in a recreation of 2014 America and do n’t state any of them the apocalypse has occur . Just , you hump , for the lulz .

7) One man and one woman survive, and they repopulate the species.

AKA the “ New Adam and Eve ” story , which is such a common cliché in skill fiction and fantasy that many magazines now lean it explicitly among the plots they no longer desire to see . Sadly , if the human race were reduced to one homo and one woman , we ’d in all probability be sleep with anyway due to excessive in - breeding .

8) A weird quirk of geography

Because the United Kingdom or Japan is an island , they ’re somehow spar from a plague or global disaster . Or there ’s a valley that ’s miraculously dependable from a disaster that wrecked the intact quietus of the existence , as is the case in the young movie zee for Zachariah .

9) A moonbase somehow survives being flung away from Earth at insane speeds

Somehow , Moonbase Alpha travels fast enough that the man are able to visit an integral new extrasolar satellite pretty much every exclusive hebdomad — but they ’re not killed by the gravitative stress ( and cosmic actinotherapy , and a billion other things ) that they encounter while hurl through blank space , in the still - awesome Space : 1999 .

10) Outlawing all human emotions, plus works of art and puppies

The human race is nearly wiped out by devastating wars , in the Hellenic film Equilibrium . So the survivors decide to startle taking drug to suppress all emotions ( like you do ) and because the drugs do n’t work on perfectly , they also outlaw puppies , paintings , book , and basically everything else that might provoke emotion . lead to a scene where Christian Bale finally goes rogue and practice his “ gun kata ” martial arts skill to protect some endearing puppies .

11) Deciphering a number code predicting every disaster on Earth for 50 years, created by a child and put into a time capsule

get laid is still the most delightfully nonsensical story about humankind surviving an Revelation of Saint John the Divine . Some aliens figure out the Earth is operate to be destroyed in 50 years ’ sentence . Do they discourage the human wash ? Naaah . rather , they come up with a telephone number code list the exact escort and issue of fatalities of every single human catastrophe that will happen in the next 50 old age — every train clangoring , every wing - bender — and get a child to write it down and put it in a clip capsule , which will be dug up exactly 50 year from now . So that someone can find out it and realize the humans is end in a few day , and get a couple of kids to safety . Makes TOTAL SENSE , right ?

12) The world’s geniuses escape to a hidden “gulch” where they prosper while society collapses

You know you ’re a genius if you understand how Galt ’s Gulch can function in entire seclusion , without a workforce with a diverse compass of skilled ( and amateur ) occupations . You ’re even more of a brilliance if you’re able to figure out howthe geniuses in Galt ’s Gulchare able-bodied to flourish in isolation while the rest of the world is descend into an economic apocalypse , and you somehow have clip to write a five - hour radio language . I refer , of course , to the majestic Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand .

13) Restoring racial purity

In the 1973 Piers Anthony novelRace Against Time , the human species is facing disaster ( ecologic and otherwise ) because extravagant hybridisation has turned everybody into beige “ Standards . ” We ’re all one race now , and the world is doom as a result ! So in a desperate attempt to save humanity , we engineer two “ pure ” members of each of the three principal race : white , black and Formosan . But disaster threatens when these adolescent turn tail their racially segregated compound , and the bloodless son determine he want to be with the black girl instead of the white girl . ( But luckily , the grim female child finds out about the history of slavery , so it ’s fine . World redeem . )

14) Just kind of sleeping through it

In an awful number of revelatory tale , if you ’re in a coma or just kind of taking a sleep happy chance , the apocalypse just sort of leave you alone until you wake up . We ’re not talking about being in cryogenic pause in a shielded facility somewhere — just asleep . In a bed . See The Walking Dead , 28 day Later , The Survivors , and others .

Thanks to Sparkymonster , Brawl2099 , K. D. Bryan , Lun Essex , Chris Piers , Scott Thill , Ahegao Montoya , Philip Shropshire , Captain Rhubarb , Adam Edgmond , Danny Bowes , Mike Lynch , Lisa Hendrix , Wanda , Nicole Kranjc , Wendy Kloiber , John Rivers , TyR , Stu Willis , Nicholas Slayton , Zerode , Claire Light , Christina DiEdoardo , Phillip Lollar , Simon Billenness , Christine Bower , Ben Bird Wilson , Christian Stiehl , Juan Dominick Willis , Owlswan Free Eagle , Jonathan Glick , Andrew Liptak , Regis M. Donovan , Nick Mathewson , Chris Nashville , Eden Politte , Rikibeth , Ted Podromou , Kyle Baker , Martin Blecha , Brian Slattery , Par Winzell , John St. Lawrence , William Bryan Estes , LJ Moore , Scott James Magner , David Voderberg , Jenn Brissett , Jilly Dreadful , Tia Marie , Setsu Uzume , Brent D. Ryan , Cliff Winnig , and everybody else who avail out with this !

get in touch with the author at[email protected]andfollow her on Twitter @charliejane

Starship Test 9